Confidence Is Not a Personality Trait - It’s a skill you build
One of the biggest misconceptions I see in business is that confident entrepreneurs were simply born that way. They weren’t. Confidence is not a personality trait. It’s something you build through action and experience.
A coach I worked with, Jessica Miller, described it like this:
Confidence is doing something you’ve done before - you have the experience to know you can do it.
Self-confidence is doing something you’ve never done before but trusting you’ll figure it out.
Here’s an example:
Being comfortable attending a networking event because you’ve been to a number of them before is confidence. Agreeing to speak at a networking event for the first time requires self-confidence because you haven’t done it before, but you trust that you can.
Are you doing things in the right order?
Business owners often want motivation and clarity first, before they take action. But it actually works the other way around.
You take action - and then clarity comes.
You take action - and then motivation follows.
You take action - and then confidence grows.
If you rely solely on confidence and only do the things you’ve done before, your growth will be slow. I recently saw a meme on social media that said:
“Being ready isn’t a feeling - it’s a decision.”
Entrepreneurship requires those moments of self-confidence - saying yes before you feel ready.
When you take action, your confidence grows. And the more you do something, the easier it gets.
Pay Attention to What You Already Do Every Day
I work with capable women who juggle multiple complex tasks on the daily - managing families, careers, logistics, schedules, and anything unexpected that’s bound to show up on the busiest of days.
But when it comes to their business, they hesitate. They question whether they can figure something out - even though they’re already doing exactly that in every other area of their lives.
A Gen X Perspective
Recently, one of my sons asked me something that made me laugh:
“Wait, you were 11 years old, you would leave the house in the morning, and your parents didn’t know where you were all day?”
Yes.
I’d go see who was home. We’d ride bikes, maybe we’d go to the school playground, or look for other kids. But we’d figure it out and get home by dinner time, or at least before dark.
Maybe this is a bit of a Gen X thing.
Many of us grew up learning how to solve problems by figuring things out on our own.
Looking back, I wonder if that’s part of what built the instinct many entrepreneurs rely on today - the belief that even if you haven’t done something before, you’ll figure it out.
Entrepreneurship is not a straight line. It’s messy. You make decisions, you try things, you adjust, and sometimes you start over. The real skill is believing, “I’ll figure it out.”
FAQs
How do I get over doing something new and failing? Won’t it affect the success of my business?
First, you are the boss, the CEO. Second, if you see failure as a learning opportunity, you’ll be able to figure out what didn’t work and try again.
I’ve been circling some new ideas for my business, but I hesitate because they’re totally different strategies from what I’ve done before. How do I get past this?
This is one of many challenges I help clients get through in my Laser Consult Session. Get clear and move forward by scheduling your session today. I’ll help you take that leap of faith.